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SDM
7 hours ago
Straight White/Caucasian Male, 55
0 km · Middelburg

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Quote by Sofistikitty
They willing to screw me without one? So what does that mean? Like I said this came from people that have double standards. I have a white lady that requested a gang bang and the no certificate was requested. But when it came to the black lady they requested. So tell me am I assuming wrong? I am not talking out of my own. This is the statements and conversations I have had with white couples and single guys. I am merely saying that these are the concerns. And that I am offended by them. Again, I am not saying ALL men and couples. I am speaking about the people I have spoken to, as I am trying to find a way to merge everyone together. Well, those who are interested anyway.
From experience, I am always invited as a single chick to parties and clubs. the moment I say I am bring a male partner they retract their invite. Some have even asked what race guy is. I'm sorry Shaun, but if you are not in our shoes(non white) you won't have any idea as to what I'm talking about. I am just saying that, it's unfair. Look in actual fact the lifestyle is predominantly white. It's going to take a while before non whites open up and also become more open minded. I'm not saying that people should change over night. I'm saying, don't message then. You know what your preferences are then don't request to join. I know how it feels to be "rejected" cos, in my case the hubby wanted to but the wife gave me the " we don't play outside our race". Pity we could have had fun.
I am venting so please excuse me. Still gots love for all of y'all

Willing to screw you without one, well different guy's have different requirements.
Single chick being invited to a party or club? a SINGLE chick was invited, not a couple.
Why is it necessary for whites to have to open up and become more open minded? Why should people change their own personal preferences?
YES, I agree, there is no need whatsoever for white people to be rude about their preferences, but why on earth is the whole world telling us to open up to different races? The first time a white person suggests that a non white person should do or look at something the way the white culture does, we are branded as racist.
But, to be clear, even though I am not in your Non White shoes, let me assure you, that I know exactly what it is like to be rejected (on an almost daily basis) because of my skin colour or gender. BUT, because I am white I am expected to simply keep my venting to myself.
Put "no white's" in your profile, I can almost guarantee you that you will not receive more than one or two complaints.
If I am reading your post correctly, you yourself have deduced that the reason some guys wanted test certificates was due to race. They did not seem to say that, in fact by them asking for test certs, they have shown two things: 1) willingness to engage in sexual activities with a person of a different race. 2) the wisdom to take care of health concerns like a responsible adult. From what I can see, you have made this a race issue. As far as your comment about non white males having no etiquette goes, it's more about the language barrier than anything else, in fact, in my opinion, 75% of our so called race issues in this country revolve around language barriers. It exists even between white people who speak different languages.
Quote by playcouple
as all good dic(k)tators say " everyone is entitled to their opinion and the cure for all ailments (and opinions that differ from mine) is the removal of the head"
ehhehehehe ehehehe

The skin has been removed from my head . . . does that count? rotflmao:rotflmao:
Quote by LeeEC
Oh and one more thing - Adonis, though you certainly aren't the only one to do it. For flip sakes, ending a post with an invitation for people to get uptight isn't a good strategy either.

But it was not understood what I meant . . . . .
But, there you go boys and girls, your opinion matters . . . . as long as it is a positive one.
(Pasted in quote) Seems like some only read half of what you say. How this gets interpreted as singles should leave the site and couples looking for singles should join a singles site is beyond me. At no time did I said or imply swingers should only look for or play with other swingers and not with singles. oh well I suppose if some can't add value they will add conflict. (END) (Pasted in quote) Ok daar is weer mense wat my kop gaan afbyt oor my stelling oor varkerigheid, maar gaan lees die "Quick messages" op mense se profiles, waar is daai mense se opvoeding. (END) Shawn says, I really do not understand the need for comments such as the above.
Quote by EasyGuy80
Maybe the mods/owner of the site should make a one for hook-ups/single people?

it would probably just land up being the same as this site, with all the couples who are interested in 3sums joining to look for the single person to add to the mix . . . .

@playcouple, Please help me understand the above?
Quote by playcouple

Wonder what the ANC would said about it

They would want to make sure he had a shower afterwards . . . . .
that's assuming that there is water in which case it will be a cold shower due to lack of electricity......................
Load-shedding and lack of infrastructure where government lives? ummm, I think not . . . . . wink
So it would appear as if the illusive single lady for that FFM is a rare find . . . . . I was thinking, every one seemingly wants to find a lady that is into other ladies. Yet so often when you read a profile, the couple says "Hubby not bi in any way" . . . . . . they still want another male to join them in the sack, but zero contact between men. Maybe, just maybe, there are more single ladies out there who are open to the FFM idea, but don't respond becuse the searching couple wants someone who is going to be more involved with wifey . . . . . that would give me the impression of "I am going to be on display" . . . . . . and when we remember how often other contributors say that a lot of women have self conscious issues . . . well now!
Quote by redbruce
SDMR, not sure I agree with you. I have lived in a small town, and fully understand Nicky's concern. In the bigger cities it's a whole lot easier to play far away from home, and have a lot less chance of being found out. It's much easier to hide away in the big city (although obviously your own close circle would be impacted when the news gets out). In many small towns, your business becomes everyone's business, as people tend to have much closer connections (fewer clubs, churches, schools to be involved with), and talk to each other and about each other whole a lot more. Die hele dorp kan beslis hoor! There's a lot more anonymity in the cities, which doesn't happen in a plattelandse dorp.

I have lived in two "big cities" and now live a "small dorpie", they are practically the same in my view. If you play outside of town, then big or small, you are outside of town.
Yes, the smaller towns do have local newspapers who have Paparazzi aspirations and love to put scandal items on the front page, but get caught in any town and you have the same issue.
but hey, maybe it's just the particular towns that I have lived in that have formed my opinion.
Quote by Adonis
Wonder what the ANC would said about it

They would want to make sure he had a shower afterwards . . . . .
Quote by nicky200
Ek dink daar is baie mense in klein plekke wat baie stout is en wil wees,hule net te bang dat hele dorp dit sal hoor

Ja miskien is jy 100% op die merk.
The thing is, regardless of the size of the town, if people are going to find out, they are going to find out . . . bigger towns just means more people know . . . . .
Quote by Stamina
Almost all of you fellow forumites have had a go at the "time wasters".

Stamina, it's time to let this go dude . . . . . only a matter of time before this gets unpleasant.
Quote by Pussinboots1
@ wolfman
I will have to go browse the gallery and come back to you.

@PIB1 . . . . one mouth shot coming up wink
DUDE?????????????? This is South Africa, all we ever do is complain, complain, complain. It's doing things differently, looking at things differently, finding out more about things, or even complaining correctly that we are unable to do. That is (In my own opinion) the single biggest fault we as South Africans have, all we do is complain, then we feel a little better, then we start getting a little more irritated, so we complain a little more and thus feel a little better, and so the cycle goes on and on and on. We (and I include myself here) do not do anything about anything other than to say "THINGS NEED TO CHANGE" . . . . OH, and I am also only 30 (I just happen to have 14 years experience) wink
@Newcouple2009, In continuum, I have sent you a Private Message.
While everything that was said in the above post has merit, and especially the part about sending pics before being asked, one thing that immediately jumped out at me was the fact that on a site such as this one ie: swinging / sex related site, if the woman on the receiving end was not so interested in dick and more concerned with the list as presented, then that particular lady is probably looking for a dating site and not a swinging / sex related site. But yes guy's, remember, everyone knows that TV remotes come in condensed versions these days wink
Quote by Stamina
My bucket list:
1. Physically meet a female face to face at a coffee shop that is really interested in joining a couple... Even if she does not take it further.
2. Have an actual threesome with my girl and another female.
3. Die of shock and surprise that there really was a single female serious about meeting on this site!

Just a thought young Stamina . . . .
the more you vent "publicly" the more people may just think . . . . . . . . . .
ok, I'll drop it. But I think you now have a little food for thought.
he says laughing out loud . . I have read profiles before where it would seem as if the person was looking at me while writing it. I make contact and nada. Spice up your own sex life, invite Redbruce to watch you guys tonight wink
Quote by Stamina
Ugly people exist, if you were born looking like Shrek and you weigh 150kg, then it sucks for you but the reality is you are not attractive.

And yet there is Fiona . . . . . .rotflmao:rotflmao:
Quote by Stamina
There are only three options: 1. A lady joins and get to experience someone else with her consent and in her presence. 2. I cheat with someone else without her knowing and get to experience someone new because that someone will find joining a couple weird. 3. I leave her and experience some one else as often as I want and she does not get hurt...

Or maybe it's time for a fourth option:
Change your immediate goals . . . . you say more than once that it is for both of you. So, look for a guy for threesome, look for a couple for soft swap / full swap. Look for a couple you can just watch, hell, look for a couple who will just watch you.
All things come in time, sexual excitement comes in many forms, maybe enjoy what is easiest come by and you may actually learn something that leads to making your original goal a reality.
Oh, and before someone else gets the opportunity to knock you for certain comments, maybe just change the tone of the way you express your frustration with your regular piece of A...S . . . sounds more like you have relationship issues than unsuccessful swinger searching issues.
Quote by wolfman
And as for popularity on the fora:
Spend as much time as possible writing irrelevant horseshit (like me) until the green stripe under your avatar gets to 'godlike'.

Here is some more horseshit from me . . . . (just in case the little green stripe under my avatar changes colour) wink
Take it from a "Green Striper" the amount of Irrelevant Horse-shit you write has zero to do with popularity, in fact, the more one writes, the less popular they are likely to become . . .
Quote by Stamina
What to do?

That's easy, take a breath and remember . . . . . you will feel better in a short while. At this stage, you run the risk of a fantasy, becoming an obsession!!!!!
Quote by Sofistikitty
I meant the race thing.

Again, I do not see how your post could have offended anyone. Your choices are exactly that, your choices and people should rather concern themselves with their own business.
Quote by oceanlovers
try this
go into the chatroom and do nothing ,just sit there and see how many people want to talk to you ,
dont send any messages ,winks or album invites for a couple of days . just view profiles and see who makes contact .
this will tell how popular you are and if anyone realises you have gone quiet .
steve

I think I understand where you are coming from on this Steve, and while I do not spend time in the chat-room, we have had a similar thing once or twice here in the forums, where on the very very rare occasion someone would ask, hey, where is so and so these days?
I do not see how your post could have offended anyone in anyway Sofistikitty? Maybe it was something you wrote before you "edited" it. But Anyway, people take things strangely sometimes. I myself have done 95% of my own bucketlist, the other 5% I will not speak of publicly. wink There is of course so much of the ticked off items that I would enjoy doing again and in different / better ways.
Quote by sensual_male
But the icing on the cake are the crude, baseless messages riddled with spelling errors...

Only too true, and in a close second on the "Quick Messages" is the requests for pics
Quote by Voyer1105
A friend is someone with a big dick that comes around every 2 weeks and leaves the wife satisfied and me eating out a pussy filled with sperm

A true friend would visit weekly wink
Quote by Irish
How do you know she's not ? lol

Katniss told us all very clearly in her post that underneath her jet black locks, she was indeed a blonde.