Fear of rejection holds people back from many things. Whether proposing a deep-seated fetish, or asking someone if they enjoyed last night’s session, the potential for turndown is scary. Telling your partner that you’d like to have sex with other people? Now that’s a whole other scary-ass ballgame.

How do you suggest sharing one of life’s most intimate activities, without upsetting your partner? Honestly, there’s no guaranteed approach. Your partner’s response will depend on how it’s presented, your existing relationship, and their own open-mindedness. Feeling hot ‘n ready? Here’s 5 ways to suggest swinging to your partner!

Learn your partner’s views on swinging

A casual mention of swinging in conversation isn’t a bad first-time approach. You could mention a news article or a movie that talks about swinging (see below) to gently test the waters.

Watch a movie or TV show about swinging

Swinging is slowly easing its way into modern media in a better light. Movies, TV shows, and books are beginning to offer an improved view on the lifestyle, making it gradually less taboo. Check out any of these the following movies and TV shows to ease into a discussion on the lifestyle.

TV Shows about swinging

The reality-style series takes place in a mansion full of swingers, and each episode features a couple who is new to the lifestyle but wants to try swinging. The show truthfully presents the lifestyle’s ups, downs, and dramas. Warning: prepare to binge watch – this show is seriously addict

Watch porn that features swapping, group, or threesome play

If you and your partner enjoy watching porn together (or would consider trying), this can be a fun and sexy way to suggest how hot a particular fantasy would be to fulfil. A glass of wine (or several) can be a playful aid here 😉
Suggest a sexual fantasy that involves other people

Another way to propose swinging is to share sexual fantasies that involve other people. See how your partner reacts to this. Are they curious? Skeptical? Shy? Gently inquire if she or he has their own fantasies that involve other people. Some examples include threesomes, having sex with two people at the same time (e.g. double penetration or “DP”), or being watched by other people while having sex