How to hunt pussy OK, I hope I have your attention now. I did not originally write this piece for swingers but I think it may be relevant here. It is sort of a continuation of the piece that I wrote about etiquette for single guys. Note: For all the LGBT people out there, I wrote this from my view as a straight guy. However, obviously this writing is for you as well. Just change the language/gender as required by your preference. Here goes. Every now and then, the clumsy guys get slammed. The guys who use poor hunting techniques are not popular here because many of them/us try to make up for it by boorish behaviour. Also, being a single guy on a site like this automatically comes with a bad rep. In a dramatic break with tradition, I think that maybe one should try to help. First of all, if these guys leave, they will just be replaced by the same. On the other hand, imagine a community where every girl is treated to pursuits of exquisite skill on a daily basis, and where masculine wordsmithery is the order of the day. Secondly, if you are a guy, you have been that guy. You have been clumsy in your romantic pursuits. Maybe it was a long time ago, but it happened. For that guy who I used to be, here’s a lesson: *** Don’t be the hunter. Be the watering hole. *** Read that line again. It’s that simple. The fact is, contrary to what the chick flicks say, you will not woo her with an amazing impromptu speech about how much you need her. Why? Because, most of us are more concerned with our own needs than with those of others. Even when you give to the poor, it is partly to satisfy your need to feel that you are in fact a good person. So, learn her needs and show her that you can satisfy them. She needs water. Be the watering hole. Think about this: How do you feel when someone wants something from you? Do you like it? Well, if you act like the hunter, you are wanting something from a woman and she ain’t giving anything away for free, buster. In fact, you may well find her tongue a surprisingly sharp blade because you are just pissing her off. On the other hand, how do you feel when someone wants to give you something awesome? Would you fight them off? So, have something awesome to give. Actually, no, do better than that: Be something awesome to give. Be more than a big cock or money. Every guy’s got a cock, many of them bigger than yours. Money.. well, don’t be a fool with money. Just, be the best man that you can be. The fact is, you are in competition with many other guys. If you want to win, you have to be able to offer more than they can. So, remember: Any guy can offer her sex. Any guy can offer her his insecurities. Any guy can offer her attention and compliments. Trust me, she sees right through that. Any guy can offer her boasts and lies. Rather let your actions speak for you Any guy can offer her manipulation. If you do, you are a weakling. Do you really have to revert to that to get pussy? Grow a pair and hunt like a real man. Any guy can offer her a shoulder to cry on. Although, if you throw in a strong pair of arms to keep the world at bay, you should do OK. I would suggest that you offer her the following. This is not a complete list, these are just some ideas: Offer her the envy of her friends for bagging such a catch. Offer her happiness or, at the very least, some good laughs. Offer her the best body and skin that you can. Smell nice. Offer her selfless wisdom when she has need of it. Offer her friendship. Real friendship that is not dependent on sex. Offer her a safe place to express and to explore her sexuality. You will get shocked/jealous/insecure. But you will also grow. Offer her extreme pleasure. Learn the skills. Google it. Make a drawing if you have to. However, there is one thing they don’t teach you in pussy school: Sexual pleasure for a woman is not just a physical thing (yeah? Tell that to my vibrator). Thing is, a good lover will know how to get into a girl’s head, sexually. Learn it. Learn how to open that door in her head that makes it OK for her to cum. That place where she is a primal, sexual, wanting being. Offer her a man worthy of being wanted. Offer her a man to whom she wants to give the gift of her body Offer her your honesty Offer her a Man who she is proud to call her lover. Offer her your appreciation of the gift of her sex and her mind and her trust. Offer her an appreciation of her own beauty, even if she does not see it. That’s why good photographers get all the hot girls. Offer her courage when she has none to give. Offer her calm when all the world is in turmoil Offer her patience when she is troubled Offer her personal growth. If you can offer these things, you will be more man than most. OK, so you are able to offer all these things but no-one can see that. Well, that is where marketing comes in. It is very difficult to show the type of man that you are through mails. Most girls here have received letters better than you can write. My suggestion is this: Lesson 2: *** Be a good ambassador for yourself. *** An ambassador is not a salesman, but he is not a wall flower either. He markets that what he represents by being something to look up to. He does not boast, because his actions are worthy of his office. An ambassador does not hide. He is in the public eye. He does stuff that people can see and admire. Would it not be awesome to have an amazing ambassador that represents you to the community? Well, become that ambassador yourself. Another thing I have learned is this: Women go for alpha males. It’s been proven over and over again. So what if you are not a typical alpha? Well, here’s a little trick: *** There is more than one way to be an alpha. Find the way that works for you. *** Instead of trying to be an alpha, just be prominent. Let’s say, for instance, that you are in a band. OK, so everyone wants to bang the lead singer and you are just the sound guy. Common wisdom says that the spot of alpha male has already been taken. You can accept that and just sit in your sound booth all day feeling jealous OR you can start filling a more prominent place in the band. Do the CD cover designs, organise the tours, make sure that people’s outfits are in good repair. The lead singer is too busy shagging around to do these jobs. In fact, nobody wants to do them. So, you work a bit harder, and suddenly everyone knows your name. You are the go-to guy for most things. Your importance in the ‘tribe’ increases. One day, the back-up singer with that geeky look that drives you wild is so happy with her new outfit that she gives you a great big hug: “Gee, Tony, you are such an awesome guy. What would I ever do without you?”. These days, you are so used to chatting to hot groupies and staff that you actually forget to be nervous at the sudden show of affection. You shrug your shoulders and speak your wisdom and she sees the man inside. The world becomes a better place for you. This may seem a bit whimsical but it illustrates what I am trying to say. Some ideas for fulfilling alpha roles in this community are: Write (Do you really think I did this just for your benefit? Hahaha!!) Photograph Organise events or become involved in organisation. Guide people new to the scene without getting all predatory Make stuff Host parties Have awesome toys Teach skills Assist with counselling Be the go-to guy for stuff. Basically, find your inner alpha. Even if he is just the committee scribe. It will take time to learn these skills. You may have to go on a journey of self-discovery, almost like Gandalf’s fight with the Baldrog. You may have to spend some quality time with women’s magazines in order to better understand them (I did, and I can recommend it. Women are not that difficult to understand). You may have to spend years broke in order to develop character. I did that too and can really recommend it in hindsight. Once you have spent some time improving yourself, you will no longer be the man that you are today and people will not look at you in the way that they do today. You will be something better. You will be that guy that everyone flocks to. If this seems like too much work, ask yourself: In a year’s time, do I still want to be the lonely guy that I am today? Become a better man and you will see results, probably sooner than you expect. Make the effort and reap the rewards. Happy hunting! Fx