Many people drown in this flow of life; they are simply overwhelmed by it. Some can't "get" enough flow and feel cheated or bitter. Others drift aimlessly without purpose, alienated and unaware there is a flow. This flow of energy between opposite poles of male and female is the key to harmonizing the flow of energy in one's life.

Yang is fire and yin is water. Man is the fire, and woman is the water. When man makes love with a woman, he cooks the woman's water (in her womb) with his fire (penis). The woman is almost always sexually stronger, for her water puts out the male fire; his erection loses its flame. Yin, the soft and yielding, always conquers yang, the hard.

Ideally you enter the battle of the sexes with a spirit of gamesmanship. You approach not with the intention of defeating your lover, but in the hope of matching her grace and receptive energy with the exact complementary male skill and force.

Unfortunately, few men today seem to proceed with such tact in love-making; as a result, most are beaten soundly within minutes by the woman. This failure is due to tactical ignorance of both the male sex organs and the nature of sexual energy. Misunderstanding of love's strategic laws is so widespread that a myth has developed that the average man cannot fully satisfy a passionate woman.

Untutored man's nature is to attack: he possesses the offensive weapon. Woman's is to defend: she protects without exhausting herself. When man assaults furiously and discharges the sperm, he crumbles. Yet the woman may remain most eager to continue, even if she kindly denies it and thus "spares" her opponent.

The point is this: Man must stop throwing away his sexual energies. When he stops the sperm loss, woman is no longer in a position of superiority. She meets her match and no longer suffers disappointment. Man doesn't exhaust himself and retreat in humiliation, yet feels he has met a good match. Woman reaches the limits of her erotic capacities and is ready to make real peace with her opponent.

The battle between man and woman is over when both recognize that neither can "win" by either dominating or submitting. At that moment, both become free to surrender to each other and exchange their deepest love—their vulnerabilities have been matched and their fear of losing is neutralized

A true orgasm occurs when both man and woman continue to pulsate together. Their sexual energy completes a full circuit between their two magnetic poles, charging each of them more fully than before