Join the most popular community of South African swingers now
Login

How to respectfully decline as a single male?

last reply
6 replies
746 views
3 watchers
15 likes
Forum Virgin
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

I'm still new to Swinging Heaven. How do I respectfully decline when I am not interested in someone?

I have received some messages from people showing interest. What if I request a face pic and I don't feel the attraction then, it feels rude to decline someone because of their looks. Similarly, what I meet them in person and I don't feel the attraction or the chemistry? One-on-one I could do it in person, but I wouldn't know how to with a couple.

Forum Virgin
Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

If you are meeting in person for sex i feel you just have to suck it up. Otherwise, ghosting / getting ghosted is par for the course for this type of site.

Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

Quote by Stoetbul42

I'm still new to Swinging Heaven. How do I respectfully decline when I am not interested in someone?

I have received some messages from people showing interest. What if I request a face pic and I don't feel the attraction then, it feels rude to decline someone because of their looks. Similarly, what I meet them in person and I don't feel the attraction or the chemistry? One-on-one I could do it in person, but I wouldn't know how to with a couple.

Always be honest, tell him/her that you are not attracted to him/her/them, you will earn a lot more respect than just ghosting somebody.

Warming the Bed
Swinging Heaven Logo 2 likes

Never suck it up...be upfront and honest about it. They might get upset sometimes but it is their issue, not yours. Most will respect you for being truthful.

Forum Virgin
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

Quote by yann

Never suck it up...be upfront and honest about it. They might get upset sometimes but it is their issue, not yours. Most will respect you for being truthful.

I was referring to hookup meetings specifically. If you are sensitive to physical appearance or chemistry then maybe anonymous internet sex is not for you and it is then your responsibility to organize all the pics and coffee dates you require before you arrange a hookup. You can't expect someone to plan, take time out of their day, and commute to a hookup where you don't deliver.

Swinging Heaven Logo 4 likes

It's never easy for anyone (with a heart) to decline another person/couple. If I don't feel attracted or a connection to someone, I feel it's best to be honest, but soften the blow. Start with a compliment. Even if it's general. Tell them they seem like great people, but you just don't feel the attraction you need to continue. After all, bodies need to respond in a certain way for most of us to go ahead. If it's not fun, don't do it.

Warming the Bed
Swinging Heaven Logo 6 likes

Honestly just say " No thanks " and move on . Any true swinger Will bow out and move on without needing explanations.

The problem however is too many people playing swinger these days and not enough understand the lifestyle