Well...we, my partner and I are actually coming to believe that 95% of the profiles on this site are not here for the reason the site is here!
We are very quickly forming the opinion that most ppl are here to perv, collect pics, and voice their sorry versions of what they think swinging is about.
Too many bad mannered, uncouth and just plain dickheads hanging around this site.
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Forming an opinion.
Orgasminator
It's the internet, it's about sex and porn. I'm pretty sure if you shut down all the porn sites there would only be one left called bring back the porn.
But in all seriousness this is still the internet and you have to sift through plenty of crap to hit paydirt. Also when given the veil of secrecy it's easy to play around without caring about the 3rd party, what can they do? Not much you can really do to separate the fakes from the friends either, best you can do is look for verified members and not get upset when another couple goes silent or is a no show, their lose not yours.
Orgasminator
Well I've had 3 couples not pitch for drinks, even more who say hello and then go silent. Make a 3rd album pvt and fill it full of porn pictures for those guys who send messages asking for pics
Sexlightened
Have to agree with both statements made...it is a hassle to meet people in the first place who's compatible with what you what out of this. And then to have them fizzle out (our term for it)...or just plainly ignore you, it's irritating. But that's it-just irritating. And it's not just the couples who are to blame...on the few rare occasions we actually got interested in a single guy the same happened. One guy even had the audacity to contact the missus and ask for a solo play, after we stated it very clearly we only play together. I think one has to learn very fast on this site that not everybody is here looking for the same thing...just to bad the "nice" couples and singles has to suffer because of it. Honesty and basic social interactions doesn't cost you anything! But...we will not be phased by the bull on the site...it's part and package on a site like this, sad but true.
@ joyrider...thanx for your input even if it was not in the forum. Yes, we are very 'picky' and will remain that way...our prerogative ain't it! BUT, us being picky certainly does not alter the fact that the majority of ppl on the site are certainly not here to swing...they are here purely for the pornographic aspect, these are the ppl we were referring to and we believe they outnumber the 'for real' folk hugely.
Anyway, as you said...'Go deep' fella, have a good one:thumbup:
I'm starting to think it would go a long way to simply tweak one thing about this site. Stop single profiles being able to see or search other single profiles.
I think the main reason we have a problem is women. Women who have forgotten how to slap a boy down and teach him how to respect women. Time we start changing things everyday, every where. Start demanding more respect. Then the little arseholes won't think this is a pussy sand pit designed just for their own little narcissistic porn fueled pleasures.
Warming the Bed
Quote by LeeEC
I'm starting to think it would go a long way to simply tweak one thing about this site. Stop single profiles being able to see or search other single profiles.
I think the main reason we have a problem is women. Women who have forgotten how to slap a boy down and teach him how to respect women. Time we start changing things everyday, every where. Start demanding more respect. Then the little arseholes won't think this is a pussy sand pit designed just for their own little narcissistic porn fueled pleasures.
By taking the browsing function away you will be stopping serious singles from finding each other as well as the pervs that are here only to collect pictures and harass ladies.
There are some of us online that are serious about the lifestyle, and making a blanket browsing removal would be seriously affecting the genuine people together with the others.
My suggestion would be that people reported should face more than a 24 hour ban from the chat room, or from the site as a whole.
Maybe a 1 week ban for first time offenders, a 1 month ban for second time offenders, and a permanent ban for repeat offenders.
A guy seeing any harassment occurring should report the member immediately, with substantiating proof.
Alternatively a woman being whispered without her consent should, instead of just getting angry or shrugging it off, also report the whisperer.
The thing is - there are PLENTY OF SITES for singles to hookup on. This does not need to fulfil that need too. This is a SWINGING site ... for flip sakes it's called swinging heaven! Its not a dating site or a fuckbuddy site or a singles hookup site!
Singles coming here to find singles will not be happy with the results from this site at all. If you're single and you're not into couples (whether bi or not) then you'll be very disappointed. The single girls here are not interested (the large majority of the very small contingent of single female members) or looking for single guys. They are here to find couples.... for threesomes. They do not want ANOTHER random oke trying to get into their pants... they can find one of those just by walking down the street, don't you think? If we're being honest....
Btw no one has mentioned the chatrooms and this discussion isn't about the chatrooms. The bans suggested by Pez are actually MUCH more lenient than the actual existing responses to bad behaviour. So clearly that isn't the problem or the solution to the behaviour.
A much stricter and more tedious and information rich, sign up process for one, which includes explanation on what swinging actually is - the stats of members in your area (so single guys can see upfront that there are no single female members in their area looking to be disrespected and cyber-wolfwhistled at) AND indicates that this is NOT where you will find a free freely available no-strings-attached fuck. Also the rules should be displayed DURING sign up and a note on how strictly the behaviour of members is dealt with and a reminder that "free sign up" does not mean free-for-all.
Another cool feature I have seen on a dating site : "indication of interest". If you find a profile you like you can "indicate your interest" the receiver has an "interested parties " page on their profile where they can grant contact permission, which allows the interested party to mail them. Before the permission is granted you can't mail a person. Permission can be revoked at any time.
It's like having everyone blocked by default and then selectively granting access, rather than the opposite, which is current, where everyone has access and you block them if they cause shit.
Sex God
When I, or you, or him, or her, or even that couple over there initially signed up to this site, there was no confusion about how it works, or about who could or could not create a profile, about how the searching and contacting and winking and gallery and even forum features worked, and we still signed up and created a profile with all this knowledge.
Yes, these members can be a little irritating or a little frustrating and what not, but people, this is the real world with real screwed up people who are probably mostly under the age of 21 who now have a platform of anonymity available to them, what did we expect to happen?
Orgasminator
Quote by cpl2play
Maybe the solution is a site ONLY for cpls, and then the site that is for all. We certainly would be on the cpl's only site. Then we would only have to deal with half the problems (hopefully).
Or rather the option to hide your profile from singles and that way they can't see yours unless you add them as a friend. That way you can still meet singles in the chatrooms and still have the option to find a single if the urge arises.
Quote by Mike_Pta
Maybe the solution is a site ONLY for cpls, and then the site that is for all. We certainly would be on the cpl's only site. Then we would only have to deal with half the problems (hopefully).
Or rather the option to hide your profile from singles and that way they can't see yours unless you add them as a friend. That way you can still meet singles in the chatrooms and still have the option to find a single if the urge arises.
What a good compromise.
Orgasminator
Hi Guys
While you can't block a selected account type from viewing your profile, you can block them from mailing you.
Go to Settings, under My Account and select the Privacy Tab,
Under - Mail Settings, you can select to block one or more of either Couple, Male, Female.
This will block people with the selected account types from messaging you, however, people on your friends list will still be able to message you.
While maybe not the perfect solution it can go a long way to help.
