Hi there everyone. I have not posted anything on the forum in sometime, but now I think I have found something for everyone to chat over. Now the thing is first think of what I am saying and what I am asking before putting a comment.
Right the other day we were standing at a braai when one of our clever friends brought up the following subject: rocking each other’s world during sex. But the subject went something like this
Right you a happily married clp been with each other for some time. In other the words the perfect match. Now every now and then you ask your partner after a good sex session, how was that on a scale of 1 to 10? And your partner gives you an honest answer every time and says 8 or a 7 but never a 10.
Meaning you have never got your partner to reach a 10.
Would that worry you, because if you can’t make your partner reach a 10. Because their answer is always a 7 or 8 out of 10. Remember now think of it this way your partner rocks your world just about every time with a 10 out of 10 for your but you don’t rock their world with a 10 out of 10 every now and then.
And it made me think a bit. The feeling for me if my partner has to say o it was an 8 out of 10 would crush me.
How would it make you feel?
Needless to say there was many different answers that came up like well she is still with me so I am doing something right. And when the question came up like what? Everyone went from pillow to post with their answer.
Now think about what was asked then answer the following.
How would you feel to find out if you don’t really rock your partner’s world and why do you think your partner is still staying with you? Or is it better not to know the answer?
OK, here goes.
If I am not giving her a 10/10, I'm not sure I want to hear what a 10/10 would sound like. At this stage the noise is almost unbearable at times (OK, I might be exaggerating a bit) but she gets pretty damn loud and it always ends with a huge smile on both our faces.
Will my "manhood" beable to handle hearing that I am only a 8/9? I really don't know.
Why would she stay with me even if it isn't? Maybe she doesn't know better...
Anyway, interesting topic, well done.
@ joyrider,
I have never even thought to ask my Girlfriend on the scale to 1 to 10, on how our lovemaking was for her.
I will ask if she enjoyed herself if she was a little less noisy or I could not read her body language but never asked her to *rate* me.
She again also never asks me to *rate* her performance.
We are together for over 30 odd years, I think we can read each others body language by now.
So yesterday when I read your posting, I did not answer right away, I could not do that ,with out my lovies input.
After going to bed last night (not making love at all) I did ask her if she still enjoys my attentions and the things I do to and for her, she did look at me funny and asked me *Wat nou*?
So I did explain your question and why I am asking a *rating*,
Now her, being used to my weirdness and the way I think about sex and the things I usually do, she did not blink an eye, just told me She would rate me BETWEEN an 7 and a 8.
So I guess I do not really *rock* her world anymore....you know that funny tummy in a twist feeling you get when you see or touch someone you like I seem to have to get to do that to her once again....
TIME for me to TRY and rock her world once again......HOW do not ask me how, I will have to find something *else*in my lovemaking arsenal she does not already knows.
Help would appreciated from you guys!!!! give me ideas!!!!
As for the *STAYING* part,
heck if I know why she stays she says it like this...
*Wat se nonsens wil jy nou weet?*
Ag, okay man....seker maar uit gewoonte......
Soooo making big eyes at ya all....HOW in the world should I take that???? I am just a *gewoonte*
I think a LOT of people stay together "uit gewoonte", just because it is a whole lot easier and actually comfortable, even if we do no longer rock each other's world like we maybe used to once upon a time (those of us who have been in longstanding relationships). There's a lot to be said for true friendship and stable companionship, even if the sex isn't always 100% exciting.
Now if I were to ask her if I "rock her world", and she rated me a 6 or 7 or 8, I would be very interested to know who did / would she give a 10/10 rating to! ;-) And then I would want to know what he did differently.... And work out what I could do to improve..... ;-)
Hi everyone and thanks to those that had the guts to ask the question to their partner. And yes it is a shock a big shock. it feels like your whole world has just fallen apart, but the 1 good thing by doing that is you know you should go right back to the begining. When you met one another, and do that which you have not done in a long time. For me it was something stupid like just kissing a lot more during the shag session.
And now i rock her world again, jipee.
come on guys who else has the guts to ask their partner out of the blue the same question and post your findings. Or is there now only 3 to 4 people on the furom?
Been together for 32 years and married for 30 years... gave my missus a 7 out of 10, not because she is not good at what she is doing, it's just that the novalty has worn off a bit and we need to do those special little things like sneaking off to have a quicky in a daring place and add some excitement to our lives...
Missus : I am not disappointed at getting a 7/10... being together for so long is a challenge and you have to work hard to keep each other happy and entertained... if you do not it gets a bit boring. Think of things that will make your sex life enjoyable again. The most important thing is to communicate and be on the same page. Share each other fantasies and try and fulfill each others needs.
I give hubby 6 out of 10.
Hubby : Quite shocked, thought I was better, have some real home work to do and need to put a serious effort into it. (HELP GUYS)
Interesting indeed.
Firstly, one should be careful of what questions one asks, you may not get the answer you think you want.
While a 10/10 would always be a fantastic answer, the truth of the matter is that you probably would have got one within the first few months / years after meeting only. Sadly - it does change after that.
When you first started dating, you couldn't keep your hands off each other, couldn't wait to see the 'other' or call them to chat. As life goes, some of the sparkle dims a little, but it doesn't mean it gets worse - rather, it takes on a new / different significance. Not bad, but different.
A little extra padding here, a little droopier there, hanging not quite as high.....Life takes its toll, but again its not necessarily bad, just....different.
Somehow, it settles into something more ...meaningfull, comforting and satisfying.
If its unsatisfying completely - well, thats another thing. If you start chasing the 10, well you may find the performance pressure adds to the anxiety and you start scoring (and hanging ) even lower :-(
looking at some of the Ads, most guys score themselves a 10 regardless :-)
Did I ask you may ask....?
Not in the mood....
The voice of reason
Now if I were to ask her if I "rock her world", and she rated me a 6 or 7 or 8, I would be very interested to know who did / would she give a 10/10 rating to! ;-) And then I would want to know what he did differently.... And work out what I could do to improve..... ;-) Now Mr Bruce. That is what I'm not sure my fragile male ego will be able to proces...not after hearing her scream anyway :P
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