Quote by LeeEC
From: This one is for the girls only;
! Ah Vamp, if you get the chance you should read back always through the last few months threads, people got chatty and started having fun here, and some of the more serious forumers got uptight and then aggressive, then some people got nasty, and when finally things settled and started coming back to fun and chatting and interesting discussions, a series of extremely objectionable characters showed up, one after the other, to offend, aggravate and irritate in varying degrees almost all of the regular and faithful contributors in the forums. Even one who made it his business to personally and privately terrorise, antagonize or otherwise injure other forum contributors in their private mailboxes, which quite frankly is simply the tactic of a bully.
He also decided to take me on BECAUSE I was a moderator, like he thought it might make him the cool guy in the group... no idea what his motivation was. Anyway, some people are still feeling a bit tender and cautious, after that incident. Please understand they just need to be convinced you're genuine.... hey you're round the (my) corner, we can have coffee and I will vouch for you!
Thing is - on the note of the argument about "cliques" is that everyone who participates in a conversation is included in the conversation. I've only seen very objectionable people get completely ignored.
If you're not participating, then really how the hell can you be included?
The participating parties can not be reasonably blamed for non-participation of other people... that's the friggin weirdest illogical idea I even heard!
Then the next argument about how people challenge other's points of view. Yes , this place is MADE for debate. You have to be willing to actually take the debate if you want to participate.
There are literally hundreds of threads to read back over to get a feel for this thing, you can do your own research, it's all there right at your fingertips. I mean we all have had disagreements with each other. Everyone, but that doesn't make us horrible people, it makes us intelligent sentient beings with our own opinions, and we are ok with not agreeing with each other sometimes.
Having done this reading, it would be quite clear to you what to expect when participating in the debate.
My best advice USE THE EMOTICONS - it really helps when interpreting people's tones.
If you're feeling offended by someone, clarify their meaning before reacting. A LOT is lost in a conversation without facial expressions, tone, body language... a lot can get lost in translation.
You can't go in blind and then complain that it isn't what you want. (Not that I'm suggesting that this is what you did Vamp)
Well Lee, it would seem that some of that nastiness and bullying has rubbed off on one of the Vet members.
Please feel free to use your Mod powers to have a look at our in and out boxes and you'll see what a mean.
Seeing that we have taken the effort to tick all the correct boxes, added enough pics and have had all our verifications done, I don't see how much more we can do to show that we are genuine.
As for cliques, in all my posts and direct questions to you (some in jest), you have only once referred to me / us and that was in the third person. Have I always been that objectionable?
Remember the post from HostingCouple about Race Concerns
well that prompted SDMR to state the: "No threads about Racism" phrase three times.
Do you guys remember DevinePE, well she also ended up disenchanted with the way people treated her on the site and has left.
On two previous occasions you have implied to fresh contributors that they are imagining things about the vibe they are getting. Now again to Lady Vamp.
Ever since I posted the thread: "Fakes have rights too" I've been getting more than just a cold shoulder from some members, just because I showed concern for the quiet ones.
Do you think the other readers don't pick up on that and don't become weary of contributing?
Do you think that does not contribute to non-contribution? Now that's the friggin weirdest illogical idea I even heard!
As you may well have noticed, I love debate, as long as it is constructive. Going on about the meaning of phrases when someone calls this site a joke, gives an incomplete motivation and then calls it a waste of Megs is not constructive.
On two occasions I have changed my views on topics (DE & Rhythmic stimulation) due to what was said in these discussions, yet I've never noted any of you admit to doing so. What is the point of debating then?
As you said there are hundreds of topics in the anything goes folder alone.
Google have many hundreds of geeks that refine their search engine on a daily basis to be intuitive to what you are looking for and it is even adaptive to where you are. So if you search for a Pizza shop it is likely to bring up the ones in your area first.
SH search feature still requires Boolean characters to be inserted in your request to get meaningful results. Not ideal for the average swinger. I'm not knocking SH, it is just not feasible to create a complex search engine for the nature of this site.
Also with all the treadjacking and huge amounts of banter in between, it is exhausting for new members to find the appropriate old threads amongst the over 700 others. So it is all there but we don't have enough fingertips.
So when you advise Lady Vamp to go and do research, I hope it is not a means to tell her to come back later when she knows what is going on.
Just remember you may be tired of an old topic or necrothread but for many it will be the first time they see it, so please don't give them attitude or ridicule.
As for EMOTICONS they haven't soften the blow for me and when Nimfie uses them it would appear that guys still don't get that it is her and not me posting. Maybe we need He, She, Them logons for the forums as in the Chat Room, so people can see that it is Nimfie posting and not me. She does not deserve the same abuse as me.
Going in blind: I studied the forum for some time before my first post. I saw that my views were quite different as to the norm on the forum, so I did brace myself and you are welcome to keep it coming. If and when I have time I'll respond depending on my rotating shift schedule at work.
I'd also like to add. I'm an Afrikaans speaking dyslexic. I rely totally on the English spell checker as not to sound like a complete moron. And no thanks, doing it in Afrikaans is worse.
Then every time I read your posts I see: I couldn't possibly have sex with someone with such a slender grasp on grammar!' ? Russell Brand
Now although funny, like most Brit comedians he is greatly sarcastic, so I wonder. Then I read your thread: Is it just me? Spelling!
The thing is, most of my misssspelling and Oddy grammar is intentional, but sometimes it is just how I was made. It however means that I have to put way more effort in to make a posting.
Considering the outcome of being different, for many it is just not a worthwhile task.
By the way Nimfie says Ditto.
