19 Nov 2017

I remember the days when we were young and fucked like bunnies; having crazy sex in the afternoon, go shower afterwards, sex in the shower, complete showering and then just cannot get our clothes back on as we continue like bunnies. Those were the days...

While being married, the contraceptive pill's poison started building up in her system. We experienced what many married men complained about: "put a ring on the finger and the hole closes up" - although a crude sentence to type, this I heard from so many men.. Not only did the pill reduce her sex drive, but she was usually dry without self lubricating and almost never climaxed. Mrs was quite moody, and we would argue more that we needed to. We were stuck in first gear, and just could not get out of it.

Looks like the pill is known to have these affects on women, but were never advised by the doctors who prescribed the pill. This continued for years, until we decided that she had to get off the pill - but how?

We agreed that I go for a vasectomy (the snip), but I was quite reluctant - I cringed even when we took our dog for the snip. When taking him to the vet, I swear that my own balls pulled up in fear. This is no small feat for a man!! I researched (googled) the topic and it appeared that 90% of men went through the procedure like a breeze and some even went to work directly after the procedure - no problem. A very small number of men complained that they felt that a horse kicked them in the groin - well this was me.... pain like I have never felt before, continuing for days. What have I done to myself. After about a week, the pain subsided, but only completely went away after about two weeks.

After the snip (and Mrs stopping to take the pill), our sex lives came back again slowly but surely. We went back to 100. Wow, what a feeling. This was when I realised that it was worth it. Thinking back, would I do it again? YES, definitely!!! We were like teenagers again. The snip was painful, but worth it.

You often hear of couples struggling with sex and the related conflicts - I always ask: "Is the wife on the pill?" and the answer is almost always; "Yes".

I wish I knew this earlier.

PS!! You are probably wondering how/when we reached 300km/h? Well this was when we started talking about swinging and an open lifestyle... and actually took that step - now only 2 months ago we are in 5th gear. Only after leaving the vanilla lifestyle, did I hear; "once you let the cat out of the box, it will refuse to go back in again" with reference to the ladies being introduced to the lifestyle by their husbands, but then wanting the lifestyle more and more - the proverbial Pandora's box.