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Successful Adverts

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Sexlightened
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*Disclaimer*

Plase note that this post is not intended to offend anyone or to poke fun at anyone's "Swagger". It's Purley out of curiosity...

So we have been on here for a while and have read thousands of adverts that have been posted. 

Out of all the adverts that we have been through there are certain ones that have stuck in our minds, these adverts are mostly posted by single men and we see them fairly often...

We are curious to know "How successful the guys are / were with these types of adverts"

ADVERTS 
 
1. Who is going to be the Lucky lady that I'm going to let suck my cock today?

2. I'm horny and want my cock sucked now!

3. Looking for a quickie with a very hot Chick during my lunch hour.

4. Looking for sex with a Sexy Chick or someone's wife. No long chats. Dont waste my time. I don't have a car so either you pick me up or pat for uber. 

5 Looking for a Quickie with a sexy woman with big Tit's. But it must be fast because I have things to do in the afternoon.

6  Looking for good sex today. I can host in my car.


These are just a few off the top of my head... So how successful are these types of adverts? 

Any woman that has responded to these adverts and have actually met up with the guys please contact us because you must be alot of fun.


Warming the Bed
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believe it or not ........ I once responded to this tipe of add. Was something in the line of " home alone and horny.  Need a quick fuck ".


I was in JHB had time to kill and the guy had a decent body and pretty huge member . And I thought... what's the worst that could happen ?

Arranged to meet at the bar of the hotel I was staying. Waited in a little red summer dress as I said I would wear.

Had this really scruffy guy check me out for like 20min and just as I thought my meet was a bust and got up to leave. This sweaty scruffy guy walked up and said " I believe you ordered a good hammering " . Now this person was obviously working up to that line and it took a few beers to get the courage. But he looked nothing like his profile. And although I have a fluid concept of what shape will turn me on , I really wouldn't do him even if he drugged me. 

I politely said no thanks, and mentioned that his false advertising wont get him laid and left. Before I did though he called me a " poes hoer" . Like seriously dude if you took a shower before you whould have got it for free ... lol ( not a whore but do have a lovely pussy).

Later that day I screwed the bartender . That was fun ..... 

Warming the Bed
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Quote by PoohC
*Disclaimer*
Plase note that this post is not intended to offend anyone or to poke fun at anyone's "Swagger". It's Purley out of curiosity...
So we have been on here for a while and have read thousands of adverts that have been posted. 
Out of all the adverts that we have been through there are certain ones that have stuck in our minds, these adverts are mostly posted by single men and we see them fairly often...
We are curious to know "How successful the guys are / were with these types of adverts"
ADVERTS 
 
1. Who is going to be the Lucky lady that I'm going to let suck my cock today?
2. I'm horny and want my cock sucked now!
3. Looking for a quickie with a very hot Chick during my lunch hour.
4. Looking for sex with a Sexy Chick or someone's wife. No long chats. Dont waste my time. I don't have a car so either you pick me up or pat for uber. 
5 Looking for a Quickie with a sexy woman with big Tit's. But it must be fast because I have things to do in the afternoon.
6  Looking for good sex today. I can host in my car.


These are just a few off the top of my head... So how successful are these types of adverts? 
Any woman that has responded to these adverts and have actually met up with the guys please contact us because you must be alot of fun.


 We often wonder the same about these ad's. 

Even from our experience, when we have placed ad's, the responses are not great. We get more attention just from being online, or occasionally posting a pic. For us, generally speaking, ad's dont work, or should we say, they dont work in attracting the people that we like. 

Can only image the single guys "luck" with ad's is a very low hit rate, with those blunt sort of ad's. 

Our 2c

Sexlightened
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Quote by sexysam69
believe it or not ........ I once responded to this tipe of add. Was something in the line of " home alone and horny.  Need a quick fuck ".


I was in JHB had time to kill and the guy had a decent body and pretty huge member . And I thought... what's the worst that could happen ?
Arranged to meet at the bar of the hotel I was staying. Waited in a little red summer dress as I said I would wear.
Had this really scruffy guy check me out for like 20min and just as I thought my meet was a bust and got up to leave. This sweaty scruffy guy walked up and said " I believe you ordered a good hammering " . Now this person was obviously working up to that line and it took a few beers to get the courage. But he looked nothing like his profile. And although I have a fluid concept of what shape will turn me on , I really wouldn't do him even if he drugged me. 
I politely said no thanks, and mentioned that his false advertising wont get him laid and left. Before I did though he called me a " poes hoer" . Like seriously dude if you took a shower before you whould have got it for free ... lol ( not a whore but do have a lovely pussy).
Later that day I screwed the bartender . That was fun ..... 

 That first part of that story has given every male on this site some hope and reassurance that there are woman out there that are horny and do meet up with guys 

Hopefully the GUYS learn the lesson out of the story and DONT Bullshit!


Lucky Bartender! How was he?




Warming the Bed
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@ PoohC... the bartender was okay ... nothing special but not bad. 

I enjoy random hookups. And I like to "play down". It sounds egotistical i know, but when you give that guy a chance that clearly didn't have a shot, the sex is better . Or maybe it's just my fetish... . 

And no, the boys won't learn a thing..... because the popular belief is that swingers is a bunch of horny sluts that would screw a nightstand if it stood in the right place. Also that our partners just freely give us to any bloke that happen by. ...sigh....

There is the odd gem out there though, and this trend got me thinking.....

I'm going to find me a tubby shy cuddly guy, dress his ass in a santa suit.... and bang him like a drum . 'Tis the season....

Sexlightened
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Quote by sexysam69
@ PoohC... the bartender was okay ... nothing special but not bad. 
I enjoy random hookups. And I like to "play down". It sounds egotistical i know, but when you give that guy a chance that clearly didn't have a shot, the sex is better . Or maybe it's just my fetish... . 
And no, the boys won't learn a thing..... because the popular belief is that swingers is a bunch of horny sluts that would screw a nightstand if it stood in the right place. Also that our partners just freely give us to any bloke that happen by. ...sigh....
There is the odd gem out there though, and this trend got me thinking.....
I'm going to find me a tubby shy cuddly guy, dress his ass in a santa suit.... and bang him like a drum . 'Tis the season....

 You are a LEGEND! The world is a better place because of woman like you. GOD BLESS YOU!

 I think I can speak on behalf of all the Shy Cuddly Guys on here... We don't give a Shit what you call us as long as we have a shot at banging you... 😁

Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes
Quote by sexysam69
@ PoohC... the bartender was okay ... nothing special but not bad. 
I enjoy random hookups. And I like to "play down". It sounds egotistical i know, but when you give that guy a chance that clearly didn't have a shot, the sex is better . Or maybe it's just my fetish... . 
And no, the boys won't learn a thing..... because the popular belief is that swingers is a bunch of horny sluts that would screw a nightstand if it stood in the right place. Also that our partners just freely give us to any bloke that happen by. ...sigh....
There is the odd gem out there though, and this trend got me thinking.....
I'm going to find me a tubby shy cuddly guy, dress his ass in a santa suit.... and bang him like a drum . 'Tis the season....

 😂😂😂 I'm sorry this is too good an opportunity to not volunteer for!

Insert *amazing interest text so that I don't get roped into the same boat as other single guys * end it off with I consent to be banged like a drum, thank you. 

Warming the Bed
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The sad thing is after this damn lockdown and working from home for 38 months since March 2020 I could be that chubby Santa Claus. 

*cries into ice cream tub*

In related news, I've noticed there's a guy who posts a dick pic on so many couples walls with the text saying "I'm keen". I always wonder if he ever gets a response to it. 

Warming the Bed
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It all boils down to respect and good manners and being blunt and rude will not work, far worse is posting a dick on profiles. Wonder if it is his own dick. Women approach sex on an intelectual level and rude and crude will not stimulate their interest. My penny worth on this one. 


Warming the Bed
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Quote by jtrdbn
The sad thing is after this damn lockdown and working from home for 38 months since March 2020 I could be that chubby Santa Claus. 
*cries into ice cream tub*

In related news, I've noticed there's a guy who posts a dick pic on so many couples walls with the text saying "I'm keen". I always wonder if he ever gets a response to it. 

 I'm keen to know myself... Has he ever struck gold 

Warming the Bed
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I haven't checked some of the dude's ads but heard a lot of complaints about their ads and how they be pulling a no show, 4 out of the 6 I've seen from women aswel, @Sexysam that's awful because there are some of the legit guys who decides not to post ADs or reply to ads for different reasons, either the ad is old or the scruffy dude has filled the spot, however like they say "you will kiss few frogs before getting to the Prince", surely that bartender cannot wait for your next visit