Join the most popular community of South African swingers now
Login

Kink.

last reply
12 replies
1.3k views
8 watchers
7 likes
Master of Sex
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

When I was still playing, people used regularly ask me how to either introduce someone or how they would know, if someone is into Kink.

Heck I can only usually tell them what used to work for me. And only after I was mentored into the lifestyle!!!
Except for asking directly if someone is into something, there is a few methods I used to use to see if someone is either into or at least open to kinky play!
It also differs from female to this was way way back before I went into my permanent relationship. 
Females was always easier for me, although I do not look or act *Butch* in a female to female situation, I do tend to take the active role! In Fact I do not really like BUTCH ladies, they must really still remain feminine that is why I like ladies, they must not try and be like a man.
If I did not know my partner well and wanted to play kinky games, I used to start of testing the waters, by pressing the lady to a door or wall or on the bed, holding her hands tight  so she could not touch me, then kiss her, and give her little bites. After letting her hands free, I would then demand she do NOT touch me, when I start playing with her body. She would either tell me to fuck off...or do as I said. That was usually my first indication to know if she is open to kinky games. Next was not to only rub and pull lightly on her nipples  but to also give them the unexpected pinch and even little bites. Slapping her inner and outer thighs. Giving her slaps on her bottom. Asking her to keep her eyes closed and stop play if she opens them.  These was early early signs that she was open to kink. Only then would I chat about Kink and all the possibilities. 
For men well they are way way more complex, usually taking the active role, was not always easy, while sexually playing, I would also give them little ass slaps, play with their nipples, give little bites...once again....it would work or not.... those years, doing anal was considered KINK, by many, many men, heck pegging was mostly unheard of so if you just slid your finger down their ass crack and over their anal opening (not even penetrating the sphincters)  they would either freeze up...or moan...... You  guys should remember, in those years being kinky was totally a NO-No...  and you had to know people who would vouch for you before you EVER gotten invited to any party or get togethers. I had a great mentor and teacher who guided me. One should also remember kink is NOT just being hit and tied up...it has many, many facets. And the main thing is, ALWAYS think of KINK as a dangerous sport...as there is many many dangerous little issues to remember when playing kinky games. And like I always try and tell people  THINK about the LONG term issues that could develop after years of doing /allowing the same thing, when you do certain activities!!! 

What was your first indication of being slightly kinky or being KINK just open to the thought?  Or did the thought of kink never cross your mind?

Master of Sex
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

Here I am ...sitting waiting...WAITING......   on SDM  who took up a *dare* to /comment or answer all the KINKY fora`s.

Sexlightened
Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

Everyone is into Kink, They just dont know it yet... 

When i met my wife, she told me that she was Not into being tied up, or spanked, or filmed and there was NO way she would get involved in the Lifestyle...

I just said "Issit"? 


Master of Sex
Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

@PoohC   Truer words have never been spoken!!!!  Pasting in...*Everyone is into Kink, They just don`t know it yet... *

Forum Virgin
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

Id this too kinky?Filling her superwet pussy with champagne, then drinking it .SLOWLY

Sexlightened
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

a kink grows on you. if someone brings it up, youre like nahhh not for me or us, but the seed is planted. the more you think about it, the more a kink it becomes that you would like to try.

Master of Sex
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

@KINKYone2one   Nope I don't think it is too kinky...I know a lot of Kink when I see or hear about it, yours seem tame in comparison. 

@lizaan  I know just what you mean, once a little seed is planted a person does seem to think about it...and soon things develop to the more enjoyable...

Sex God
Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

ok, guilty as charged. . .my apologies. I will sort myself out (no, I do not mean masturbate) . . dry

Forum Virgin
Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

Kink is progressive, I can remember the time I got a boner just from a glimpse of a girls panties. It is all about growing sexually. Some ppl reach a level and decide this is it, boundary has been reached and live the rest of their lives avoiding crossing the boundary while others take it to far maybe and that is how you end up with things like necrophilia. Our sexual growth is inherently dependent on our natural kink evolution

Sexlightened
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

As well as what we get exposed to and what also then becomes normal. 

Swinging Heaven Logo 0 likes

I also believe we are all into some kink but we have our limits.

Master of Sex
Swinging Heaven Logo 1 like

@iamican and amethyst  you are both right, exposure to all things sexual makes us slightly jaded over time.

@Henny55 We all most certainly have limits. As any Kinkster will tell you,  we all have lists and list of HARD limits (meaning things we will never do).

And as iamican mentioned, some people really to my own impression and mindset, takes things to a DARK unacceptable place. But of course what is a dark place and unacceptable to me, might not be for someone else....